Friday Thoughts

-the stimulus package might suck big ass donkey balls but, frankly, my inclination to read a 647 page bill convuluted into an unnecessary amount of words designed to make the average person pull out their hair in frustration for lack of understanding is about this much. This much is my thumb and index finger actually touching. american apathy and irony in my convoluted statement of a convoluted bill equals FTW.

-on the same note, Nancy Pelosi incites immense ire. Does she not have people working for her, helping her to think a little bit before she opens her mouth? Who says, "we won the election, we wrote the bill"? Like, seriously, is she st00pid? Really? Does she not understand that congress is actually for we the people, not we the specific party? Hi, Mrs. Pelosi, "we the people" elected a President who ran on the platform of change, get with the program, please, and cease using divisive language to express divisive sentiments. Put up or shut the fuck up? Yes, maybe? That is all and thank you in advance.

-I'm a little irritated and not quite sure why, but, this too shall pass.

-A cooking frenzy this way blows. The pounds are adding up. But oh so yummy. I've made lemon garlic fish, applesauce pork chops, green bean casserole, cheesy chicken casserole, desserts..in the plenty. I am using SPICES. OMG. STEPFORD WIFE it feels like here. (be not offended cooks/chefs/housewives/stepford wives, i am inside joke a plenty)

-I really know why I'm offended. Jesse wants me take some chinese herbal medicine shit that he says is for my cramps but in reality is for my "moods". Niice. This is a part of my inside steford wife joke. Because, really, that is what he would like me to be. =)

-What's wrong with having different moods, anyway? I let him, or anyone, know that my mood is not a reflection on any action of another but is because of myself. I apologize in advance and disclose that a "mood" is upon me and it's best to probably leave me alone with it.

-I refuse to take medication to "subdue" my "moods". I am not against anyone else taking any such medication. I understand that it works for other people and could possibly work for me. I have my own fears and reasons for why I don't want to take any. That should be good, enough, yes? Or no.

-do you know that 1+1=2 and if you mix red and purple it becomes blue? Is logic all that it's cracked up to be?

The End.

Scratch me, please, I'm begging

My back is itching like fucking mad. Like mad, I tell you. Like, I want to claw at it like I'm in the throes of the most intense orgasm ever experienced by anyone in this life, past life, or any life to come. Fuck.

My new blog song is freaking awesome, don't you think so? Say you do, dammit! =)

It was freezing outside today but it's starting to warm up and the sun is shining and smiley! Much better than yesterday, woot woot!

Obama has done so much work already and everyone should be immensely pleased with that but, unfortunately, I've heard people say stuff like, "well, he kind of HAD to, didn't he?". Uh, no. Most presidents do jack but set a political tone in their beginning days, so why should he be held to a different standard, especially by naysayers? Jerks. Give props where props are due.

Jared fell down on the cold, wet pavement when he was playing in one of those little kiddie electric cars that was much to little for him. He has a HUGE knot on his head and a cut under his eye. I'm not good under pressure, maybe, because when he came inside I was like "aaaahhh, what do I do?" as I was pulling off his jacket. I dabbed a few wet cotton balls on the cut until Jesse came in to clean it up. Omigosh, he cried so much, poor baby. My idea to fix it was to murmur a lot of "it's okay, honey, it'll be okay" and take him to the store to pick out something, then drop him off with my mother. (He's been staying with me for a couple of weeks)

omigod my back is still itching. I can't handle it. I'm a wimp. Seriously. Like I can hardly think of anything but scratching. Shit.

The L Word is on tonight.


That's it. That's all I've got. Holy fuck...(seriously, scratch me, now)

The L Word

I thought most of the first show was boring but it looks like an interesting season. The best part was the end..the last like 3 minutes with Shane and Jenny looking at each other. It was intense. The music, too...fuck, I love that song. Totally the song of the hour.

But the look? To describe it...so hard. It was like sexual tension but even transcended further than that into...something else.

There is nothing much in the world like the betrayel of an ultimate trust. It sounds corny because..

a. It's just a television show
b. it was your basic friend cheating with ex scenario

But..not really. When you put a trust in a person, all of your trust, and define them as the one person in your life who would never ever hurt you, and then they do..like the jenny and shane characters...

I have never seen such expression in such expressionless eyes. <--Jenny's eyes. I've been hating on her so long but in that moment felt some weird kinship. From the previews, I can tell I'm about to get into disliking her again.

How can I put the significance of that look into words so that everyone can feel it, too, and why is it so important, anyway? I don't know, plus I'm tired so..

Great, great acting in that scene. I rewinded it a million times. (okay, probably like ten)

I will so cry on the last show. :/

Well

Getting that tattoo was quite literally the worst physical pain I have ever experienced in my rememberance. Seriously. Not exaggerating. Maybe I have a really low pain tolerance or am just a wussy with a p in front of it or it was a really bad spot, but..shit, fuck, holy hell was like a mantra in my head. If you ever need to experience no thought or completely shallow thoughts-get a tatto. =)

Play by play:

omg I can't handle this
Breathe, Katherine, breathe
Do people really pass out?
omg that would be so embarassing
Just count, every time the needle goes in, start counting
Fucking Angelina Jolie
omg it's like it's piercing my brain
How did she do it with that crazy tool
I'm going to kill this mofo if he doesn't stop
1, 2, 10, 15, breathe, 40, shit! breathe!

He told me to make sure I didn't hold my breath so I was worried that I was, lol. I don't want to scare anyone but I want to be honest. It hurt like crazy. But it was probably the area. There are always big, tight knots between my shoulder blades and that probably affected it. Plus the fact that it was so big and took so long. Here's the thing-we stopped before he filled in the red background color. I was running late getting there, the artist was running late with finishing re-touches on the drawing, so we got a late start in general. Well, Jesse went to Austin with me and he had to be at work by 10 and we barely finished the outline and symbols and everything by 9:15pm. It takes an hour just to get back to Marble Falls so we kind of had to book. I won't lie, I was kind of glad to stop but on the other hand, I was disappointed because I wanted it over and done. But I can go get the color filled in in six weeks if I still want it. My sister and Jesse says it looks good without it but I dunno, it was a part of my plan so...

SO! I didn't cry (until after) or make him stop or curse out loud (much), so that's pretty good, right?

Thinking a lot about it before getting it, I was worried that I would regret it because it's kind of big and definitely bigger than what I brought to the artist (he said it needed to be because of the symbols, that if they weren't larger they would morph into each other and become unrecognizable after a few years)

So, it's not the cute, sexy little heart, butterflies or stars that your average "girls gone lesbian for a tshirt" get. It's not in a spot that is generally reserved for women...on the back of neck, lower back, ankle, pelvic area or arm band. So, I dunno. I hate labelling people but you know that a woman is generally stereotyped "manly" if it's not like any of the ones I mentioned above.^^^And well, I like being "womanly"...sexy. So. I thought maybe I wouldn't be sexy with it.. But I don't know. I like it, I think. Just kind of like, woah, that's on you forever, chick.

The tattoo. Summum Bonum. The pursuit of the highest good. I'm in love and awe with that phrase and concept. Upon reading it months ago, it's been kind of etched in my brain. But I didn't just want the words..also a symbol to go with it. But I couldn't find one, think of one that was perfect. What is the highest good anyway? For me, for you, for everyone? A debatable subject...

And then gaza/israel...googling stuff, I came across this in a blog...



And so I started thinking about all the wars and death that have long since passed. Flagrant destruction of people...so easy a choice to make it seems. Too easy. Too much. Too often. And why? What is the driving force that usually motivates people to hurt each other, physically or emotionally..in whose name are rivers, oceans of the blood of people? God. Everywhere God. Your God, my God...never our God.

I don't know what or who God is. I don't know if the right thinking comes from Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Hinduism, Daoism, Paganism, Unitarian, or Buddhism..

But. This is what I do know: We are the only animals endowed, by whatever or whomever, with the ability to reason and to put vocal form to our reasoning. And yet we are the only animals who kill each other for reasons other than basic survival instincts. Our regard for each other is so little. Less than that of what we consider unintelligent, dumb-god's animals. I don't understand it.

The highest good, for me, is living in high regard, even awe of one another-no matter our difference in beliefs or even because of them. The aim, the highest good is to live peaceably, to be men and women who...as Reverend Lowery said in his benediction... turn to each other and not on each other..



So, the background is supposed to be a rich red. (pardon my pimplage!) I originally had the words Summum Bonum within the peace sign and the male/female symbol in the O of the Bonum, but the artist changed it. This theme is similar to the "coexist" general them (which is what he named mine on his book even though I don't have those words!) I think we can do better than coexist though...

It's crazy big, huh?

A Not So Ordinary Day

Politics are often considered uninteresting in their very tedious and ever reaching corrupt nature. Most people would rather do without it, an understandable inclination. What we have seen in this campaign and election is striking in that an unprecedented amount of people became interested, with an unbridled curiousity, hope and drive to elect one man. A man who has, in whatever magnetic or common sense way, seems to have filled us with an undeniable sense of self and community.

I stand with the majority of America, the world even, in pleasure and pride for the course of events over the last many decades that have culminated in what we saw today. The first African American person to hold the highest office in this land was inaugurated on our Capitol floor and named the leader of the free world-United States President Barack Hussein Obama.

That this was done on the day after the anniversary of the assassination (edit: not the anniversary, the national holiday of) of another remarkable man, who fought ceaselessly for the possibility of this day, marks the hour even more significant. Doctor Martin Luther King Jr is quite assuredly an American hero and someone in which I have held great fascination and unending admiration. His ideas, expression in words and constant action behind them makes him one of the greatest activists in all time-in my eyes. To quote a friend:

While Dr. King is today remembered mainly for his marches for civil rights, later in his life he developed a wider view of what the struggle was about. He identified three evils in society--racism, militarism, and materialism--and understood that these evils fed into each other. It was not sufficient to eradicate one of them; it was necessary to eradicate all three.

Dr. King also had a reputation for inflexibility. After the Civil Rights Act of 1964, he continued to push for voting rights, despite President Lyndon Johnson's insistence that it would be infeasible to have civil rights laws in consecutive years. Dr. King kept pushing, and the Voting Rights Act was passed in 1965. Later, President Johnson felt betrayed by Dr. King's increasingly severe criticism of the Vietnam War.

It has been 80 years since Dr. King's birth, which means that he might still be alive today were it not for his untimely death in 1968. There is no way to know how he would view American society now, but my guess is that he would be quite critical. The three evils of racism, militarism, and materialism that he identified are still alive and well. Politicians like to use the holiday to reflect on the progress the country has made since then, but Dr. King would not have been one to sit down and pat himself on the back.

Without King, who knows if today would have been possible. And this is why I say, "the course of events over many decades".

What I will remember today is a speech that history will write as nothing short of "great or genius" given by President Obama. His ideas and expression in words filled my entire being with something almost godly-so perhaps the "messiah" jokes weren't too off base. ;P

What I hope to see in the future is the action, by him and us all, behind his ideas and expression in words, because without them, they hold no merit or meaning. I admit to being disappointed and a bit lost in the irony when President Obama spoke of our very real economic crisis while in the middle of a 150 million dollar celebration. The ostentatious nature and show of it while tens of thousands of American workers are beind laid off daily lends credence to us having "much work to do" and broadening our vision on the true value and inherent meaning of change. America has long been a nation of "show" and it is one of the first things I would like to see go. But, Rome wasn't built in a day...

What I hope everyone remembers is that while this is, unequivocally, a day in which every African American should feel pride, celebration and justice-it is also a day in which every American, who holds equality for all mankind with utmost respect, should feel responsible and hopeful.

The United States of America is such a young nation for all the things we have endured. While other countries have existed for century upon century in constant turmoil and violence, America has made what I hope will be a lasting progression from slavery to today, in a relatively short amount of time in comparison. That should fill us all with hope and a sense of accomplishment while we celebrate this day.



And I'm getting my tattoo in three hours. ;P I put the deposit down yesterday so there's no turning back or I forfeit my money. heh

HOO-RAY to you all.

Well goodness..

I'm a bit dramatic. It was just the group, really. I was at 4k and we were talking about what is emo, what's not, etc and someone linked a flickr group about self mutiliation. We usually tag that kind of stuff NSFW (not safe for work) so people know they're opening up something...sexual or gory..or just generally not safe to open at work/around children. But it wasn't tagged and I unwittingly opened the link and got caught up in this girl's photostream. It was rather heavy, hard to take in and I was angry because I saw someone commented on her..cuts...that she was "beautiful and brave" and they knew how much it hurts. Seemed like glorifying it..counterproductive. I don't know, anyway. I don't feel crazy alone. But I bet that girl does.

And I really do think there is more good than bad in the world.


Drunk blogging=fail.

So, I'm in the middle of INDECISION. I really, really want this tattoo that I practically designed myself. I found the right artist and he loves it and wants to do it but it's soooo extremely hard for me to justify spending $300 so someone can draw on my body. I know that the artist deserves it because it's a lot of work, it's just hard finding a real reason to spend so much money. For me. I usually only buy stuff because I need it, you know?

It's gorgeous though and significant. I have to decide by Monday because if it's a go, I want to get it done on Tuesday, inauguration day.

Sooooooooo excited about Tuesday.

,

i feel like...like crazy alone.

like...the only person on earth. like, nothing can fill me up inside. it's such an awful feeling. i mean it goes away it's not always there. but it is a lot. just there in my stomach. i thin kit's the music i listen to.

i don't even know why i feel like this it's so fucking ridiculous. i have lots of peole who love me but maybe i don't love them i guess or i dont' even know. i don't even understand this shit. i mean, i know its also because i'm tipsy or whatever but i still feel this way on a softer..um, like..less conscious level

i hate even being this honest because people will always use it against you your um, like..vulnerable parts. i mean they won't use it at first but they will eventually you know. they really will.

because people can't hangdle other people's real real vulnerabilities. it scares them. my life is not so bad. tonight on flickr i looked through these awful groups of people who mutiliate their body who does that right? but poeple do that because the pain is that great and it makes you look at yourself like wtf nothing you've expercienced compares. it pales in comparsion right? seriously. there is so much bad in the world and my motto used to be "there is more good than bad in the world' but i dont' even think that's true anymore. i dont' think thats true. i don't. so what are my options. what are the options. you can try to make it better while your drowning in your own shit or you can let it wash all over you and drown in it., and i almost always pic the latter because really..what's the other option? be oblvious? do i be obvlivous? do i act like everything is okay with everyone else so i can just live? so i can live without thinking? fuck. how can that even be right to be living just REGULAR while so much ICK is everywhere. where is that worthy to be smile while so many other people are crying and being raped and murdered and tortured and . i can't do it i can't i can't i can't

i keep looking for antying to make everything alright and there is nothign that will last for longer than a minute nothing there is nothing. and it's not some feeling like oh katherine is so feeling for other people, that's not what it is. it's a selfish FOR ME to find good to fill ME up. to make ME feel less alone. it is total SELFISHNESS. you have to understand that part or it's..it's lost. the meaning is lost. i can't even say it right right now.

Bright Lights

The beginning is weak. I'll tweak it up a bit when I'm feeling more. it seems forced, not me. when i write this stuff on paper there are so many fucking arrows saying "this is wrong, what do you mean here, wtf is THAT, be more clear, be less clear, where the fuck are you katherine..........


I thought to open a bottle of yesterday
And pour it down my throat with too human greed
Letting every remember when slip over
And rest between the creasing corner of my lips

In front of your mocking mirror, I would stand
Watching every moment and experience
And my tears and yesterdays would tangle all up
in and around each other, blurring the reflection

I didn't know, I couldn't see what you wanted me to be
What you made me out to be under the illusion of the bright lights
Lit by the inumerable nights under your own big city owned marquee
But really, in the end, falling short of even a fallible dream

Small town building heights it was and that was okay
Back then, all of it held in so high esteem

A constant deja vu kind of living
Full of an almost lackadasical type forgiving

But today, oh god, take us back to life; childlike
again and again
forever in our yellow submarine

this is my dream
is my dream

my dream to dream

OMG

I have the worst fucking camps in the world. KILL ME. And I have to wear a freaking pad that feels like a fucking diaper because a tampon right now feels like I'm walking around having sex with Dirk Diggler or something. And I keep LOSING at dominoes!!!

JESUS CHRIST ALREADY.

Yo

I have been "unplugged" so to speak. Not entirely by choice and only in certain areas. Something about me sitting at the comp staring at pictures of dead people and reading about them for hours gets to the people around me. I can't help it. Read a digg article and it links so many more and I get sucked in on some crazy obsessive...whatever.

Yesterday I sat at a stop sign for a few minutes waiting for it to turn green. That was fun until someone honked.

For the past few weeks I've been like a freaking..god what would you even call it, the old time housewife ladies who make fabulous dinners and never have piece of dirty laundry in sight? Yeah, that's me. Still, it feels like playing house. Not real. I'm only sixteen! In my mind.

I have zero semblance of time. I've been reading some of my old posts and responses on 4k, from '04 and am like, what? This person was a member then? I could have sworn they were newer. Five years of recorded debates and hard times and good times and changes...and it's so odd to look at, to read. But so glad that it's there. Like a diary.

I keep forgetting to put 2009. Year changes are hard for me to remember in the first month.

The ortho yesterday? Oh.my.god. My teeth ache. They're shifting. See what had happened was (you HAVE to use the voice) when I was just a young girl I was at some birthday party at splashtown and there was a long slide waterslide to ride down. Well, the powers that be said two people couldn't go down together, but my friend and I said "fuck that" and she would stop herself in the middle of the slide under a tunnel and we would go down the rest of the way together. Well, I thought I told her not to wait the next time we did it, but she waited and so so I didn't try to slow myself when getting close to that portion of the ride and ended up flipping over her and onto the slide face first. Bloody mouth, tooth knocked out, mother too poor to fix it so the gap just naturally closed together. Now they're separating the gap to install a faker. Niiiice, yeah? Not so much.

I keep having this recurring dream every single time I go to sleep. I'm on a ship in a room with people dancing and they don't have faces really. Kind of like in that Stanley Kubrick film? With Cruise and Kidman? That one weird scene if I'm remembering correctly? The music that's playing is Fergie's "big girls don't cry" and I wander to the front of the ship and then Rosie O comes up behind me and says, "I'm no leonardo dicrapio" and I say, "yeah, and I'm no kate winslet. I'm not about to jump". And I seem angry. And then she smiles and snaps her fingers and I disappear. And I wake up sweating as if it was a really long dream I couldn't get out of...it's getting on my nerves.

I don't like my brother. I'm not sure if I love him. If he died, I know I would cry and feel a lot of pain. But I'm not sure the tears would be for him or because of the former statements.

I'm disappointed with some of Obama's picks. But I still love him.

This song is my latest obsession. It makes me want to drive faster, sing louder, live harder and do probably the exact opposite of what she's talking about.



The woods are lovely, dark and deep.........

Could the world live without music? Nah.

It so completely crazy in my head. lol

That song up there ^^ Pink talks about "coming down". I'm assuming she's talking about drugs. It's gross, the coming down, like the worst feeling in the world. You feel like absolutely nothing is right in the real world. Everything looks dirty, feels off balance, wrong, topsy turvy...like those child shape learning toys..it's like you're trying to shove a circle in the square space. I don't know if I can explain it right. It's like a panic/anxiety attack really.

OMG, I LOVE sharon osbourne. Like, she seems like the kind of woman who could take you in her arms and just cuddle you up and make you think that everything on earth is just exactly right. That show, "charm school", SHE was the best part of it.

My breasts have been super tender lately and are way swollen. Jesse wants me to go to the doctor but I don't want to. I hate going to the doctor and only do it if absolutely necessary. They always seem to find something wrong. I don't even usually take anything for a headache or cramps. The pills I take are for recreational use only. ha. I don't think there's anything of, like, dire consequence that's going to make my breasts hurt.

My nephew is too thin and pale.

That's it for now. I'm tired. Bye.

Joe Scarborough gets owned

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Israel/Gaza conflict and a bit more

How anyone cannot be truly sickened by what is going on in Gaza is incomprehensible to me. Bombing schools, mosques, killing innocent people.

Read this:

They said they were awaiting a response from Israel. Israeli officials in Jerusalem declined immediate comment on the announcement, which came amid diplomatic efforts by the U.S. and other nations to resolve a conflict that has seen 600 people killed in 11 days.

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice weclomed the initiative, but cautioned that no agreement would succeed unless it halted Hamas rocket attacks on Israel and arms smuggling into Gaza.

What in the world is the average person going to think upon reading that lovely statement by our Secretary of State? Those BIG BAD HAMAS and their HORRIFIC rockets ramming up into Israel and killing countless poor innocent Israeli civilians? Spin, spin, spin city. Those rockets? Are crude. Of an almost cave-man like status. Meanwhile, Israel enjoys the most modern of weaponry to wipe out innocent Palestinian people-supplied by whom? None other than the US, besides the millions of dollars we give them every year to support their constant attacks on Palestinian people. No, but I'm sorry-it's actually for economoic prosperity. Right.

ISRAEL broke the ceasefire. ISRAEL has killed over 600 Palestinians in the last couple of weeks compared to some 60 Israeli deaths in the past how many years? Eight, maybe? Tell me that's comparable and humane. Tell me that if this was an Arab nation doing what Israel is doing they wouldn't be labeled some salivating low down dirty dog terrorists. No one will do that because these 1.5 million unarmed Palestinian refugees have already been labeled as such by Israeli sympathizers.

I am not saying that Hamas is justified in their countless rocket attacks on Israel but lets keep it fucking real. Those rockets barely cross their borders, sometimes don't even go off, and are basically ineffectual. So as I'm reading all this stupid right and even left wing pro Israel bullshit on the web talking about how no civilised country would endure these attacks for so long without retaliation, I either want to laugh my ass off or cry because of the absurdity. If I imprison and starve you (as Israel does with its sanctions, border control and occupation) and you throw a pebble at my ankle in your anger/frustration, is it okay and just for me to then throw a boulder at you with the express purpose aimed at killing you, your family, and maybe some of your friends and neighbors too? That should be legal right?


Why did Israel ban international media?

http://firedoglake.com/2008/12/30/why-israel-wont-allow-journalists-into-gaza/

Why did Isreal consent to only 8 journalists entering Gaza when their own supreme court ruled for up to 12?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/jan/02/israel-gaza-media-access

Why is France the only one of the Big Four to come up with an initiative for a ceasefire?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/ml_israel_palestinians

Why are people so fucking pro Israel? I don't even get it and yeah I'm angry. I don't understand why they are given carte blanche to do whatever they want, whenever they want and where ever they want. You don't want to abide by the UN's picks for the Jenin Inquiry? Hey, that's okay dude. It's all good here. You want to build a fence to keep out Gazaans and you want to steal THEIR farmland to do it? Fuck yeah. Do it. You want to control their airspace, their waters, their borders and everything that comes in between them but you don't want to be responsible for them or criticized by the media for inhumane treatment as they die for lack of food, water and medical supplies? Just another day in paradise, right??

They are beating these people down like 2 dollar hookers. What is worse than beating a 2 dollar hooker? The hooker has ALREADY been beaten down and that's why she's a freaking hooker in the first place. Well, these people are refugees, not hardline terrorists. The majority of their population is and have, for some time, been on UN based refugee status.

And that anyone would even suggest this wasn't planned is another laughable statement. No civilised country would have went forward with such an unprecedented attack without at least some form of unofficial, off the record approval from their allies. People were forseeing this 2 months ago when Israel first violated the ceasefire.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081104191405AAmCs6i

I haven't wanted to talk about this because it seems that even the slightest criticism towards Israel automatically deems you anti Semetic, Mel Freaking Gibson, or even a Nazi sympathizer. Well, I am comfortable in the knowledge that I am none of those things and I will not be quiet for fear of those labels. When a thing becomes the very atrocity it seeks to destroy, every Jewish, Christian, Muslim man, woman, child-HUMAN- should stand up and speak out against it or forever be judged as a party to its continuance.

Western media has been Pro Israel for so long now that the truth is hard to find within the spin. Look at the headlines and the word plays in mainstream media. It behooves everyone to find the truth. When I saw Abu Ghraib and heard about the things going on at Gitmo, I wrote about how the German civilians always said they didn't know about what their government was doing and that I would never say I didn't know what my government was doing. Even if I could do nothing to stop it, I will refuse to wear rose colored glasses because it makes my life easier and livable.

Now, they are reporting that things are reaching almost riotous levels abroad, in the "civilised" countries. But is it any wonder why? It's no less reprehensible, it's not just, but I find it understandable.

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.-JFK

Statesmen will invent cheap lies, putting blame upon the nation that is attacked, and every man will be glad of those conscience-soothing falsities, and will diligently study them, and refuse to examine any refutations of them; and thus he will by and by convince himself that the war is just, and will thank God for the better sleep he enjoys after this process of grotesque self-deception.

- Mark Twain


We don't have to believe cheap lies. I don't want to be misunderstood on my position. The Palestinian and Isreali civilians are not to blame in a literal sense. Neither one is more innocent or guilty than the other. It is the extremists in their governments that are causing this conflict. To act as if Israel has no extremists is doing the truth great injustices. Who said that a million Arabs are not worth a single Jewish fingernail? And why did he say it?

To be sorrowful for Palestinian deaths does not take away the sorrow of any Isreali deaths that occur now, or that occurred WW11. But WW11 can not be an excuse to let Israel be forever held unaccountable for their crimes. Especially because of WW11.

I urge you guys to read this, from Rabbi Michael Lerner-

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/columnists/guest_contributors/article5446519.ece

And Robert Fisk, an esteemed British journalist that has been reporting in the Middle East for thirty years-

http://www.independent.co.uk/opinion/commentators/fisk/robert-fisk-why-do-they-hate-the-west-so-much-we-will-ask-1230046.html

Happy New Year

So most of my 2008 was about the election or Ro. Maybe that's sad? I don't know. I don't think so. I super love Barack Obama and I super love Rosie O'Donnell. There was a lot of other stuff..not as easy to put in a video though.

I enjoy getting online. The friendships I've made that now span over half a decade are important to me. There are so many things I would never have learned about life, people and myself had I never "signed on".

But I think, in 2008, I let online, specifically flickr and ro's blog, become more important than offline or even other online areas. And, in the end, it stopped being fun or beneficial or even for myself and became more of a..unexplainable and not entirely healthy addiction.

So I'm working on that. I'll still be "plugged in" as Rosie O calls it. It's just...my priorities will be weighted differently. Appropriately. And as with everything in life..moderation is key.

Have a great 2009 everyone! I plan to!

The Controversial Survey

1)Do you have the guts to answer these questions and repost as The Controversial Survey?
Sure, I'm down.

2) Would you do meth if it was legalized?
Absolutely never.

3) Abortion: for or against?
I am for the right to choose

4) If one of them had to die which one would it be- A two month old child or a 65 year old man who has the cure for cancer but hasn't announced it yet?
The two month old child


5) Would our country fall with a woman president?
Not any more than it would with a male

6) Do you believe in the death penalty?
My heart says no but my mind says I must be in order to be consistent with other thoughts and beliefs. In any event, only with the most evidential proof of absolute guilt for violent crime.

7) Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Wish? Not particularly. Agree that it should be? Totally.

8) Do you believe in God?
I'm not sure what I believe other than there is no proof to prove a god exists.


9) Do you think its wrong that so many Hispanics are moving to the USA?
Not when using legal avenues, no. But I think America is reaching a point, if it hasn't already, where the influx of immigrants by illegal OR legal entry is going to be a problem for American born citizens-essentially, a problem for American society as a whole.


10) A 12 year old girl has a baby...should she keep it?
This question is vague. Keep it as in not get an abortion? Keep it as in raise it? I don't know. It all depends on the circumstances. Ordinarily, I would say, no.


11) Should the drinking age be lowered to 18?
Definitely. If you can die for your country at 18, you should be able to have a fucking drink. Seriously. You can do almost everything at 18 and considered a legal adult in the eyes of the law. Except you can't drink. That's fucked logic if ever I heard any.


12) Should the war in Iraq be called off?
heh. There is no war in Iraq. We're just occupying their nation.


13) Assisted suicide is illegal...Do you agree?
No.

14) Do you believe in spanking your children?
I don't have any kids and I've never really spanked any that have been in my care but I'm not opposed to other families choosing to use some light form of corporal punishment.

15) Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?
...and for a lot less. You can't burn symbolism for all the money in the world but you can help people with all the money in world.


16) A mother is declared innocent after murdering her 5 children in a bathtub?
I know of what this refers, unfortunately. And she wasn't declared innocent but "not guilty by reason of insanity". Plus, this isn't a question. It's a statement with a question mark at the end. So I don't know how to answer.


17) It's between you and a person who is being kept alive by life support?
What is between us? Death? If so, I live.

18) Do you think Gay and Lesbian couples should have the right to marry?
Without a doubt


19) Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?
I'm not afraid of it, no. Is it likely to happen, sure.

But this wasn't too controversial, to me.